Be careful Al Ain Wildlife Park; the animals might be fine, but the people have a tendency to be very, very stupid.
July 13, 2010 6:00 by kippreport
Happy times this week, as news reaches Kipp that Al Ain Wildlife Park could be in the market for an elephant. The park says in the National it has seen high demand from visitors, who suggest the giant mammal could be the one thing missing from the park’s impressive collection.
“Our visitor surveys tell us that our guests want to see elephants,” said Michael Maunder, the chief collection, conservation and education officer of the park. “However, our facilities and master plan do not include plans for elephants … but we are getting a lot of interest.”
And so, perhaps the management will begin the hunt for an elephant (not literally, obviously). Shouldn’t be too hard, thinks Kipp, as they must be difficult to miss. Presumably you look in the classifieds, or buy your elephant on some sort of elephant exchange. The National article is certainly much more interested in how you transport them (wide-body cargo planes), than where you find them.
But before Nelly arrives (all elephants are called Nelly to Kipp), we’d like to offer one important tip: Make sure it is well fenced in. Not for the sake of the elephant, who can probably look after him or herself, but for the humans, who time and again prove to be the dumbest animals on the planet.
For evidence, how about the Australian man who tried to ride a crocodile this week? The 36-year-old was a little the worse for wear after a night on the town, and decided to scale the fence of a wildlife compound and take a ride on a five meter long saltwater crocodile named “Fatso.” The 800 kilo beast didn’t take kindly to the idea, and the man is now very lucky to be recovering in hospital. Not convinced? What about the New Zealand man who managed to get shot by his dog? The 40-year-old was climbing into the rear seat of a four wheel drive with a next to him when the dog jumped in too, apparently setting off the weapon. Paramedics at the scene were told that the rifle fired through the seat and into his left buttock. You really couldn’t make it up.
Having visited the Al Ain Wildlife Park, Kipp can say from experience they do a great job. What we didn’t realize until now is that a large part of that job is probably protecting humans from their own stupidity.